Saturday 10 June 2023

2022/23 REVIEW AND REWARDS


As is tradition, I like to look at a statistical review of how many games I have seen and what the costs have been. It has been a record-breaking season in many respects with a total of 202 games seen. This trumped the 178 which was my previous best from 2016/17. The number of Wycombe games was the lowest I've seen in all of my 32 seasons watching football - aside from the pandemic season where I saw them just twice. It's a far cry from the 2003/04 season when I saw the Chairboys 79 times - including most reserves games and a few youth games. 

I've been to 117 new grounds, just four short of the 121 I did during 2014/15 - this was when I was on 'just' 374 grounds at the start of that season. The number of countries visited - seven - betters my previous best of four. It's certainly been a brilliant season, worth every penny and I'll have many great memories. My favourite country again is Belgium, the grounds were great and the options were good food and drink wise. It was also a very pleasant trip on the Eurostar. The only downside has been the weather at times which has prevented me from doing even more. It seems to get wetter every season. 

Looking at costs, the most expensive ticket was my Wycombe Wanderers season ticket which worked out at £18 per game. I went to several with free entry which helped balance things out. Tickets-wise, it's only my 4th most expensive season, despite the record number of games. The most expensive part has been the travel and accommodation, not helped my having to travel further, including abroad to find new grounds. It's still not as pricey as my most expensive season of 2016/17 though. 

Extras - food and drink has been the second most expensive season on record. This is a strange and complicated formula. For groundhop games, I don't include food or drink that I've regarded as superb or when I've tried new things. For Wycombe games, I charge nothing to my costs if Wycombe win, half if we get a good draw and the full spend should we lose or get a bad draw.

The modes of transport have improved. I usually like to drive during the week and take public transport at weekends. This has been possible in all but a few cases. The emergence of Martin has meant that we share the driving between us and also Dan is starting to pay me back for some of the lifts I gave him. It's a slow but steady progress though as options are limited. I still ferry about three non-drivers on a regular basis though, so more often than not, it's me in the driving seat.

STATS

TOTAL SPEND
TICKETS: £1,137 (Average per game - £5.63)
EXTRAS: £598 (Average per game - £2.96)
TRAVEL & ACCOMMODATION: £2,996 (Average per game - £14.83)
TOTAL: £4,731 (Average per game - £23.42)

MOST EXPENSIVE GAME (ALL IN): SK Londerzeel v Sporting Club Pirates: £110 (due to the late notice by idiots at the FA pulling all football when the Queen pegged it) 

MOST EXPENSIVE UK GAME: Newquay v Sticker - £66

Cheapest - a couple of Penn and Holmer Green games where entry and walking were free. 

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GOALS
BIGGEST HOME WIN: Yarnton 11-1 Launton Sports (Oxfordshire Senior Premier - 16/05/23)
BIGGEST AWAY WIN: Watlington Town 0-10 Newbury (Hellenic D2 East - 09/04/23)
HIGHEST SCORING DRAW: Great Missenden 5-5 Aylesbury Vale Dynamoes Sports - Marsworth Cup Final - 20/03/23)
GOALLESS DRAWS - 5 

GOALS: 
HOME GOALS: 365
AWAY GOALS: 394
TOTAL GOALS: 759
AVERAGE GOALS: 3.67

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ATTENDANCES
LOWEST: 1 - Coventrains Holy Family 1-4 Sacred Heart (Coventry & District League - 03/12/22)
HIGHEST: 12,638 - West Bromwich Albion 4-0 Chesterfield (FA Cup 3rd Round Replay - 17/01/23)
TOTAL: 207,933
AVERAGE: 1,034

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METHOD OF TRAVEL
ON PUBLIC TRANSPORT: 42
WALKED: 39
DRIVING ON MY OWN: 38
GAVE OTHERS A LIFT: 69
GOT A LIFT: 14

TOTAL DISTANCE DRIVEN: 12,716 miles
BIGGEST DISTANCE DRIVEN: Chadderton 1-0 Ilkley Town - 419 miles


THE AWARDS


BEST GROUND: TREFELIN BGC

It was only through the good thinking of another hopper that I came here and it was a very last-minute decision.  As part of a three-game day, I was originally heading back home for a revisit to Corsham. But then someone told me about a friendly here against Swansea and I headed there with no idea what to expect. The location was a stunner, hemmed in on three sides by steep and imposing hills like the ground was in a valley. It also had a nice food and drink selection, a rarity in Wales.

The worst was Noak Hill. A dull, windswept 3G cage in the middle of nowhere. Thankfully, as a groundhopper, I don't have to go back.

BEST GAME: AMERSHAM TOWN 5-4 HARPENDEN TOWN

The best game of the season came during a revisit to Amersham Town in a low-key St Mary's Cup game. The hosts roared into a commanding lead but Harpenden Town made it quite close in the end. This was not long after another brilliant game in a cup final as Great Missenden triumphed over Aylesbury Vale Dynamoes Sports on penalties following a 5-5 draw after extra time. However, the football in the Amersham game was of a higher standard.

As for the worst, the Studley 0-0 Atherstone Town game was as dull as ditchwater and we were unfortunate that the poor timekeeping of another hopper left us with this as the only option.


BEST WYCOMBE GAME: 3-2 v DERBY COUNTY

It was a mixed season for my team Wycombe Wanderers. Under Gareth Ainsworth, the football wasn't always the greatest but it was fast-paced, that's when we weren't running down the clock. The best of the games was a 3-2 win over Derby County which was Gaz's penultimate home game in charge.


WORST WYCOMBE GAME: 0-3 v CHELTENHAM TOWN

A change after a decade was always going to be tricky but club legend Matt Bloomfield stepped in. It saw a serious downturn in performances and we've yet to win a game on a Saturday under Blooms. The worst of these was a pitiful capitulation against Cheltenham Town after a questionable team selection followed up by a woeful performance. The style of football has also changed to a more lethargic and languid style, albeit with a less direct approach.


BEST TEA BAR: ABBEY HULTON UNITED

One of the early season ones but the only one I went to that did oatcakes. Delicious too and served by a very friendly lady who I saw later in the season at Audley after we recognised each other. Other honourable mentions go to the pork and apple sausage rolls at Newquay and the kebab pie at Penicuik. Also, more locally, the Fat Lads special at Flackwell Heath was great, a real Behemoth of a burger and well cooked.


BEST CLUBHOUSE: SOMERTON TOWN 

It was a case of saving the best till (almost) last with the clubhouse. Generally, they are not great and don't have much on offer. However, this one offered five different ciders including Hecks Dry at £2 a pint! Other honourable mentions go to Nailsea United for another good range and Boldmere St Micheals for being very smart and having a decent food menu.


BEST CLUB SHOP: CHESHAM UNITED

Club shops with programmes are a rarity nowadays but Chesham United have an incredible range at great prices. Not quite up there with the legendary and now sadly defunct shop at Hayes' old Church Road ground. But still has a few books and random other bits. The guy that runs it, Giles, is a great bloke too and does loads for his beloved Generals.


BEST PROGRAMME

It was not often that I bought a programme, as most were token efforts, that's if a club did them at all. However, Buckland's edition was outstanding, thick and well-presented for £1.50. It also had plenty to read and plenty of facts about both them and their opponents Ascot United.


FRIENDLIEST CLUB

I've been to many clubs this season, most of them friendly and welcoming. However, the outstanding one was Ascot United. They allowed us to travel for free on their coach to Buckland and were a great bunch of people to spend a day with. I was delighted when they won the FA Vase in May, even though I have good memories of Newport Pagnell Town too.


OUTSIDE THE CLUBS


BEST DOG: SAMMY (AT HADDINGTON ATHLETIC)

I've seen quite a few dogs at the grounds this season, most notably at West Didsbury & Chorlton where there were around 20. A lot of them have been very friendly, however, the standout dog was a delightful Border Collie called Sammy who was on the Scottish Hop. A really friendly pooch who loved the attention as much as I did.


BEST PUB: THE BEER IN HAND, HEREFORD

One of several decent pubs or Micropubs in Hereford, this was the best of the lot. A great choice of cider, fair prices and a pleasant atmosphere with lots of dogs and decent people.


BEST PINT: ROSS ON WYE - LIFE IS BITTERSWEET

Another one from my favourite cider maker and again in Hereford. It had a delicious and complex taste and really was a treat.


BEST & WORST WETHERSPOONS

I've now done 250 different branches of Spoons, even if I've slowed down this season. The best and the worst happened within an hour of each other, after coming back from Slovakia. I got the bus from Luton Airport to Dunstable where The Gary Cooper was excellent. Six bag-in-box ciders, great service and hot food. The worst was an hour later in Aylesbury. The White Hart was run down and had a poo selection of drinks. However, it was not as bad as the Wycombe one, which had also seen better days. Beggars loitered around the tables asking for money and then complaining when you didn't give them enough. It's why I avoid this dive as much as possible, probably the worst in the chain.


BEST TAKEAWAY: HAMZA'S, MEIR

This establishment was visited several times and always served an interesting and tasty range of food at great prices. A wide choice of options on the menu and I already have a car full of people that want to go back and visit when we go to Hanley Town to try the 'any curry, rice and naan' deal for £7.50. 

The worst was probably the lukewarm meal that I got on an otherwise great day at Wetherspoons in Chepstow. There was also a crap chippy I went to in the Midlands, but that may have been last season. Nothing was more disgusting than Colin's Shepherd's pie that he took to Wisbech. I've always hated that meal and don't suppose that it tasted any better after sitting in his rucksack for hours.


COLIN CALAMITY OF THE SEASON

Oh dear, where do we start with this lad? I like him, but he tests my patience sometimes. As well as excessive flatulence, leaving rubbish in people's cars and often not bothering to bring any cash, there have been a number of incidents that I'd rather forget this season. I'll be kind and put it down to him not being the sharpest tool in the box. Not forgetting 'pastagate' where he made a mess in the back of Dan's car, refused to clean it up and said Dan was a 'lazy fat bastard' for not cleaning his own car

First, there was the time when he left me waiting in Amersham Car Park for 50 minutes as he'd decided to stay on at work without telling anyone. Anwar was left waiting outside his work for 90 minutes as neither of us had a clue where he was. Eventually, he turned up, offered no apology and said that it wasn't his fault before falling asleep. As a result, we saw a rotten 0-0 draw at Studley as it was the only game we could get to in time.

Then there was the time at Wisbech when he opened his door into live traffic in Wisbech. Luckily it was a quiet road and the other driver was alert which prevented me from losing the door off my car. All he could say was 'I couldn't see anything'. I engaged the child lock for a while after that but he still refused to get out of the other side of the car, preferring me to wait for me to let him out.

Not forgetting the two Fridays when I'd worked a seven-hour shift, but Colin had gone into semi-retirement at a youthful age due to medical reasons. A meet time of 4PM was arranged at my work but he still couldn't turn up two weeks in a row due to pissing about travelling over Bucks using his free bus pass. I had to drive down to Wycombe, due to the rotten traffic it added nearly an hour to the journey.

Finally, there was the time at Airbus when he threw a temper tantrum because we didn't leave straight after the game. We'd had no food as the tea bar was closed all afternoon. As it was rated so well, I'd not eaten beforehand so as to give the club money. Colin also owed me money after needing to borrow cash to get in. So going to McDonald's to put our meals on his card seemed the perfect solution. He wanted me to eat whilst driving as he was desperate to get home to play board games with his mates on New Year's Eve. As it transpired, he fell asleep before we got out of Broughton, he woke up hours later and offered an apology of sorts. It didn't stop me from getting a speeding ticket on the M42 on the way home mind. And as it turned out, most of his mates decided they had better things to do and didn't turn up.
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